Wednesday, May 28, 2008

What really grinds my gears...

I'm going to start a new series of blogs. They will pop in here and there when something really grinds my gears. Today's gear grinder isn't so much a gear grinder as just an awkward situation, but I guarantee you there will be some MUCH better ones in the future!

You know what really grinds my gears?

How long awkward hallways seem to now be a prerequisite to the building of major corporations.

Yes... it drives me nuts. It's like they START with the long hallways, and then decide where to fit in the offices. Why does it bother me? Because if corporations were like tunnels, my "place of business" would be like the ant farm or termite hill of them all.

You know how on map quest you can select a feature called "Avoid Major Highways" if you'd prefer to stay away from them? Well, not possible here. If I wanted to "Avoid Long Awkward Hallways", I would just stay home from work.

Here's what happens in the long awkward hallways. There are many scenarios, but here are the few I come across at LEAST once daily (in no particular order):

1 - You're returning from lunch, or even just the bathroom, and you begin your long journey home (to your desk, of course). As you are walking one way, there is another poor soul walking the opposite way, towards you and their home (desk... stay with me). The hallway is SO long that you don't want to be making eye contact with them the whole way, because you'd be the lucky sap to get a call from EEO informing you of your forced early retirement. So what do we do?! You look down... admire the wall... check your finger nails... scratch your nose like 5 times. FINALLY you've reached the normal greeting distance and you throw out one of those "smile nods" where no one actually says anything, but it's more like an equal acknowledgement of "yes, we both know how awkward this was, so let's just get past it and move on with out lives."


2 - You're in somewhat of a hurry - maybe you have a shortened lunch window, or you are turning in a document that's due... like 2 minutes... on someone's desk on the other side of the building (or another building altogether is more likely if you work where I work). So you get-to-stepping. AND of course you run into the Slowskies. There's like a group of 5 people that just HAVE to walk even with each other, taking up the entire hallway. Nooo... they can't hear your footsteps and move to the side, or notice your all-too-suddle throat clearing, or sniffling as I do, and notice "hey, there are other people in this world. Maybe I should make room for them". Noooo. They just keep on walking. Awkwardly ignoring, or totally missing altogether, the fact that you're behind them. So you're now in a dilemma. Do you try to find a small opening, begin pushing yourself through and then say excuse me like you do when passing a group of soccer moms and strollers at the mall? Or do you walk all the way up until you are now RIGHT behind them and just hope that you catch the corner of someone's eye? Very difficult predicament.

Am I the only one?!



April E. :) said...

Yes. You are. I don't have long awkward hallway moments. However I can see why it would "grind your gears" and I am sorry for that. :(

- Sarah :-) said...

You never even had a similar moment in high school or at church? You've got nothing?!

Dang... I need a vacation!